Felt very sad and anxious for the first part of the day. Brother left job early, and came over and told me that we should go to gym today. I didn’t sleep enough, so I was really sleepy and told him that I’m gonna sleep more and we should go at our usual time.

Then he went out to do whatever he needed to do, while I did my usual morning routine (and didn’t sleep since), and then got up and started my day.

Continued being sad for the most part. At 6 PM brother called me telling me to get ready, so after 5 minutes I was in the car going to the gym. ██████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

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Moon was looking sharp today, with Venus behind. It was snowing a little bit.

We went to the pool today. After swimming for a bit, we finally decided to go to the "hot area", which includes hot tubs kinda stuff.

We went inside the Jacuzzi. It was my first time ever, and it was for sure great to chill after all the anxiety.

After that we went into Finnish Sauna and then went for some other things I forgot name of. It was really really nice, especially given that I was feeling anxious before.

When we came back from the gym, we found a surprise on our car 🐈 🐾

We didn’t even bother cleaning it. Went to a restaurant after.

Fancy steak presentation. My phone got to 0% battery at this point. Talked more about ██████████████████████, and then I went home. Got onto my computer and ███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

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It was snowing at night.

Quite a frustrating day. ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

Roommate brought 2 tiny hamsters and told to look after them, and he’ll gift them to his girlfriend in a couple of hours. They’re pretty cute, even though one of them pooped on my hand.

Funnily enough, her girlfriend didn’t really appreciate the gift I think. This is why I don’t think gifting pets is a good idea, unless the person specifically said they want them. It’s a big responsibility to care for a pet.

Determination.

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Wanted to ████████████████████████████████, but brother made me go to gym again. Uguuu, I want to code instead of doing it…

After gym, went to restaurant and ate some yummies.

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Then got back home and took a nap.

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Realtor called me and told me that apartment I was interested (see December 13 page) in is now free, and now just needs cleaning service! I’ll probably be able to see it at the end of the week, yayy!

Went to supermarket with brother and bought a tonnnn of various yummy things.

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When we came out of supermarket, it was snowing!!! Christmas is SO saved!!! Somehow this is rare nowadays.

Went to parents after.

House welcomed me with Christmas tree and cat lurking from above.

We prepared for Svyatvechir («Holy Dinner»).

Everything was tasty and good. Then we ate some candies.

And I went to my room. After a little while my dad brought me cat :3

I fell asleep at 0:00 but since that’s much earlier than I usually go to sleep, I woke up 1.5 hours later. I went downstairs to pee and had the most expensive midnight snack.

Surprisingly, cat didn’t run away when I went downstairs, so I opened the window and got back into cozy bed.

Even though it’s really cold, I always open my window just because I can’t feel cozy without it also being cold while I’m under blanket.

Merry Christmas!

Legs still hurt from gyming a day ago. I told brother telling that I don’t want to go to gym today because of this, but he insisted we go and that I should just train hands instead. We kinda argued for a while, but because he’s usually really forceful we ended up going.

The overall mood was pretty bad. We kept arguing about random stuff. After a hour of training we went home, in the same bad mood. I just listened to music in my earphones.

When I got driven home, I’ve decided to walk a little and get some groceries. It was restful, especially with chill music in my ears.

/\ Bad stuff

Good stuff (must suck not being able to see it) \/

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Tried 99% chocolate for the first time. It’s bitter. I don’t really like it, but regardless, I always wanted to try as many chocolate %’s as possible. After all these experiments that lasted for a year, I think I can say that I like 70% chocolate the most.

Had to rise Nekoweb prices a little to account for crazy Patreon and Payoneer fees.

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Went to gym and ran 4.33km this time. Another high score. Seems like I kinda reached equilibrium at this point, because I can walk/ran for infinite amount of time now without getting exhausted.

Went to pizza place after the gym.

I’m unsatisfied with this phone’s camera at all. It’s so bad at night and the app itself is really awful. Pixel’s camera was infinitely better. My next phone is definitely gonna be Pixel, probably 9, because I think that might be the most beautiful phone made in the past 6 years.

Took a nap after got home and then ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████

While I was making breakfast, brother came over. He recently had a wisdom tooth removed, so he spent a week at the hospital.

Dad called, and he invited us to a restaurant, since it’s an important day for him. I started to prepare while brother went to pick him up. I went outside and it was already dark.

Even though it’s cold, I like to stand in darkness in warm clothes.

We got to the restaurant and got our food.

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After the restaurant I went home and fell asleep. Woke up with headache (so common when napping). Fixed some atabook stuff and went back to bed.

Most of the day was spent in bed, resting and enjoying the heater. Unfortunately agreed to some boring commission, and now have to actually think how to finish it.

So tired. Went to visit parents today because of █████████████████. Touched cat after so long.

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Then I went home and layed in bed for a long time. Insanely hard to do anything. Managed to finally ███████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████.

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Woke up from intercostal neuralgia pain, and had to move around in bed a lot to make it stop. I don’t remember if I fell asleep after or couldn’t sleep anymore, but I only slept 6 hours. Layed in bed and did my usual morning scrolling and Anki, and felt too tired to get up. Got my earphones and played windy forest sounds, and that felt really nice. I imagined myself walking near deserted road with fields around, during windy cloudy weather until I fell asleep for 2 more hours.

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Went for a late gym with brother and afterwards went to a ribs restaurant. It was good.

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Went to gym with brother today. After the gym we went to a nearby seafood restaurant and bought a bunch of… seafood.

My brother didn’t like some seafood (mussels) but I liked everything. It was actually the first time when I got to eat non-canned mussels, and they were great.

After that we went home and I continued █████████████████████████████████████

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Went to gym today and trained legs again. I’m scared to train hands because when I did it, my neuralgia always came back. So I’m probably just gonna continue training only legs.

When I came on treadmill today, my bpm was 120, even without doing anything, while my brother’s was 80. This sucks, I hope it’ll improve over time.

Ate a quaso after gym.

It was nice and rainy outside.

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More rotting today. Got nothing to do today, except doing more fixing to the same commission…

I want to go to New York. Well, I wanted to do it for the most of my conscious life. But I was recently thinking a lot about how much I want to travel.

For a long time, I was just thinking that I would try and move to Japan, but recently I started to admire other countries a lot too, and I feel like to truly decide on my destination, I’m gonna need to visit all of them. Can’t wait for war to end.

Used washing machine for the first time in my life. It was scary, but everything turned out to be fine and nothing bad happened to the clothes or the machine.

Finally cleaned my desk. I should’ve took picture before cleaning. Even when it’s clean, it’s still messy, but I like it that way.

Finally bought an infrared heater. It’s so satisfying to be in front of it. For some reason it feels better than normal radiator heating.

Pretty chill day. Did some more commission fixes. ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ Bought the most pizza pizza of my life, just like in all movies and games.

Played a bit of Yume 2kki.

We found some ocean place where you can explore the islands.

One island is particularly guarded, and after getting to it, we found a dungeon with actually pretty cool minigame with puzzles, enemies and a boss! And all of that is still in Yume 2kki. Insane how many things this game has. After beating the boss you get the reward — Menu Theme.

Wow, I think anxiety meds actually work. I keep feeling anxiety inside, but it’s very suppressed. It’s an extremely weird feeling. But it feels super awesome to not feel physical pain!

Went to hospital again today. Taxis as always were super duper quick, literally came in 30 seconds! Doctor was kinda disappointing. He checked my legs and said that I’m gonna need to get scanned and get checked at another doctor… Everything was very quick yet expensive. Kinda annoying that I’ll have to go to hospital once again…

Got response from person I made comm for that there was a bug with monitors where pixel density is different from 1. I was thinking it’s basically impossible for me to fix, since I don’t have such monitors, but then realized that I can just open my laptop and have it as my third monitor. I checked it out on laptop, and indeed, it didn’t work.

Seems that robot.js just doesn’t work properly with high density displays, so I had to spend hours on getting screenshots to work with node-ffi. I was very lucky to find some library that had such function, and I finally could get screenshots done. After I switched the screenshotter, for some reason it still didn’t work properly, and I’ve noticed that for some reason, Electron’s screen returns wrong screen offset coordinates for high density display. So I’ve decided to try using node-ffi again, and once again didn’t have much success. After hours of pain and hell I became too desperate and had to open up the beast — Visual Studio 2022. It was much easier to just write a very simple C++ program to get data about displays, and this data had actually accurate offsets this time! So I just compiled it and called it from Node.

After some more bug fixes I finally made everything work. Packaging it was pain again. Because of dynamic import I had to copy some of node_modules and it took a while to figure out which ones I needed.

During me coding all that, suddenly random people started joining the server, and then asked if I made some crypto coin, which I didn’t. It seemingly got 100k marketcap, which is pretty crazy. My site showed 150 people online, and huge amount joined the Discord server. People explained to me that it was just someone trying to profit from my name. Then some guy started sending everyone tons of crypto in server. It was genuinely crazy, and actually sizable amounts ($250+) to basically all active people in the server. He was apparently very rich, with more than 10M dollars earnt this year. ██████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████